Ten Signs I’m Turning 40

1. As I’ve mentioned before, my face is falling off. It wasn’t gradual, either. One morning I woke up and looked down into the mirror and a terrifying creature stared back at me.

Seeing as I am still about 23 in my head, this took me by surprise and I am still trying to get my brain around the fact that, apparently, I am not immortal.

2. I hurt. If I were to leap out of bed and into the shower as I did ten years ago I’d probably put my back out. Bits of me actually creak. I’m down with this, really, I am, but can I ask that perhaps the attack of gravity on my upper arms be reduced in compensation?

3. I don’t care that my shoes are bright pink with a terrible bright yellow, white and orange pattern on them. Yes, I am wearing them in public. No, I don’t care that they don’t match my handbag/lipstick/hair/child. I like them and so I am wearing them. The same applies to my zombie shoes (pictured) because I heart them too.

4. I love the grey hairs. I’ve had them since I was 23 but now it feels as if I’ve earned them. They poke defiantly out of my head like angry white sticks and I stroke them lovingly. Perhaps, with care and attention, they will all turn a lovely shade of white and it will look amazing. In fact, can that hurry up please.

5. I have no idea what music is hot. None. I have turned into the person I pointed and laughed at as a teenager. I remember my father putting on UB40 (yes, I am THAT old) and saying, “I like modern music too, you know,” when I looked at him in amazement. Looking back, I think he may have been faintly offended by the expression on my face.

6. Unconditional love. My daughter has taught me this probably more than old age, but I am more inclined to forgive others and find ways to make people happy. I’ve recently started a new habit of saying something complimentary to a complete stranger every day. I do it whenever I commute to London and so far I’ve made seven women and two men smile. And me, of course. It’s REALLY nice to tell someone that they look fantastic, and mean it. Actually, that reminds me, I need to post about it.

7. Like Grey’s Anatomy I have a Person. She is one of the most amazing women I’ve ever met and she accepts me utterly (and vice versa). She is also the woman who bought my 40th birthday card five years ago because it made her cry with laughter. So far that card has moved house twice and been seen by everybody except me. She only has a year to go!

8. I no longer own any clothing with the word “mini” in the title. It was a sad day for me but I think a liberating one. Sure, women over 40 can wear mini dresses but I’m not one of them. Not because my legs look like sausages or anything, but because I am now allowed to wear weird shit that I was too nervous to wear before. Pastels, insane prints, funny pantsuits, weird hats – I own them and wear them with pride. I thank the viral email about the “purple beret” for this fabulous decision.

9. My memory has packed up and moved somewhere warmer. I’ve put tissues in the fridge and milk in the bin. Forgotten appointments and missed trains. I’m often seen staring into space with a confused expression on my face. Fortunately, I also regularly forget to worry about my fading memory abilities so it isn’t too much of a problem.

10. Life is funnier. It’s also more stressful. The responsibilities and stresses of parenthood and running my own business don’t come without a cost. Of course I adore my child more than life itself, and wouldn’t change her for the world, but being a parent is hard (sometimes scary) work. But as I get frazzled and bedraggled, I also find so many things funnier than I used to. I notice things more. The world is a fascinating place and I want lots more time to enjoy it.


22 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Rudy McFlew
    Jul 21, 2010 @ 20:48:23

    especially about the music. I had girls at the year six disco complaining about the really old music the dj was playing when it pretty much sounds all the same to me, and has done for the last five years. I couldn’t name a person in the charts.


  2. Rachel
    Jul 21, 2010 @ 20:50:05

    First time here, checking in from SITS and twitter… LOVE your Blog!!! I would be greatful if you would check mine out too. I find your halarious and endearing… and I also tend to believe that all of us good mothers are clueless people who learn from watching and learning. Oh and I love your monster shoes 🙂


  3. Kathryn
    Jul 21, 2010 @ 20:59:24

    Amen sister and welcome to the 40 club. Excellent list, I hope I can remember who you are so I can come back and read more later on. I hope I can remember who you are so I can come back..oh wait, I am repeating myself another lovely side effect of being 41. BTW UB40 is STILL cool!


  4. Christine Morris
    Jul 21, 2010 @ 21:10:53

    I love it – and boy can I relate! Great post for 31DBBB, I look forward to reading more and completing the challenge with you!


  5. Rhian
    Jul 21, 2010 @ 21:14:23

    Ha, I didn’t know what music was current when I was 16, don’t think that’s ever likely to change. And I still spend 90% of my music time listening to the (unpopular) music that was around when I was 18…


  6. Cai Graham
    Jul 21, 2010 @ 21:26:03

    Absolutely Fabulous !
    Funnily enough I know how you feel.
    BUT I am a little older than you and it does get better !
    In fact it’s my birthday today – and I was pleasantly surprised when I opened one of my cards to find out that actually I am 1 year younger than I thought I was. Don’t know how that happened.
    I still creak in all the wrong places though !
    I am now following you blog x


    • Tamsin
      Jul 22, 2010 @ 20:13:23

      Ooooh! Happy Birthday!!! How can you miss a year? AWESOME! I hereby solemnly forget that I am turning 40 next year. Gnnnnrgh. Gnnnrgh. Damn. It’s not working.


  7. The Person
    Jul 21, 2010 @ 21:28:02

    Point Number 7 is AWESOME!

    Oh wait, I would say that…I AM The Person (actually, I am and not some random weirdo trying to be funny)!

    From your Person to my Person – I love you, you’re ace and you’d better like the 40th birthday card after all this safe-keeping! Teenage son’s passport might have been MIA for a while but I knew exactly where I could lay my hands on your card *grin*

    Smooches xx


  8. Lisad
    Jul 21, 2010 @ 22:54:55

    Great list. I too am looking fondly at my grey hair and laughing more often. No use being serious all the time. Good luck with the challenge.


  9. heidi
    Jul 22, 2010 @ 08:38:10

    Brilliant again! Love those kerazy shoes. I was going to add something else but being a fellow old timer I have completely forgotten what it was! OH YEAH – PITCH the compliments to strangers piece please!


  10. Alex @alexcampbell11
    Jul 22, 2010 @ 15:50:55

    Stopping by from SITS. Funny list!


  11. Jen at Lita's World
    Jul 22, 2010 @ 15:54:20

    Great post!! Made me laugh out loud as I can totally relate…gonna be 42 this year and life only gets…well….funnier and more entertaining. Having fun with the 31DBBB hope you are too!


  12. CMcKane
    Jul 22, 2010 @ 15:58:41

    Sweet- I really love that you’ve made seven women, two men and yourself smile. This post made me smile too.

    I’ll be thirty in about a year and sadly (for others) I’ve never worn clothes that matched.

    Visiting from SITS.


  13. Insanitykim
    Jul 22, 2010 @ 16:03:50

    Hmmmm…seems I have a one-way ticket to 40 myself. I am supposed to land there, on my feet, in about 4 years…hopefully the bunions won’t hinder me sticking the landing, and I won’t have gained another 10 pounds, which might cause the ground to cave under me…can I borrow those awesome shoes? The zombie ones, not the weird ones…sheesh…

    It seems you still have your eyesight, use of your hands and wits about you so, this post gave me hope. Thank you. *coloring my gray hairs with a Sharpie*

    Visiting from SITS.


  14. Jenny @Home is Where...
    Jul 22, 2010 @ 17:57:35

    good list! I’ll be turning 40 next year as well. Never thought I’d care, but now I kind of do…

    I’ve never seen zombie shoes before, wow!


  15. Brenda @ PeekatMyPaper
    Jul 23, 2010 @ 18:46:24

    Oh My! What an AWESOME List Post! I am not quite almost 40 – 4 more years, but your list is right on. Especially LOVE number 6 – Unconditional Love. This is me to a T! and I like it.
    Thanks for stopping by Peek at My Paper and linking-up!
    Hope you have a great weekend!


  16. Trackback: The First Film « Saffa So Good

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